Saturday, April 16, 2011

wherein I air all of my pet peeves about motherhood

I am warning you{you mothers}
81% chance of getting offended
ya know, read at your own risk
& all that fine print junk

The picture above has nothing to do with anything--including this post--
only I must tell you I got all of this for -F-R-E-E-
one day when I found a four year old ($50) gift card to Bed, Bath & Beyond from our wedding
it was glorious

A letter to my future self/my future self who has become a mother:

{more of a list of things to remember}

  1. do not lose your identity when you become a mother; before you were a mother you were someone different, don't lose her {aka a reader, a runner, a wife, a dog lover, a teacher, a yoga doer, etc. } A mother is a great thing to be, but not the only thing to be.

  2. people want to see pictures of you on your facebook account not just your baby; they want to see your baby, just not only your baby

  3. do not get a mom haircut.
    let me repeat that
    do. not. get. a. mom. hair. cut.

  4. do not let your children play where cars drive; biggest pet peeve on the planet!

  5. biff loved you first; you loved biff first. Don't throw him under the bus when a baby comes

  6. posting updates about every stinkin' thing your baby can now do, like roll over or eat cereal is actually really boring; I do believe this is why they invented baby books. I mean, it's almost as boring as the posts I already do about biff, but in all fairness there's no such thing as dog books.

  7. don't be mad if none of your babies look like you {if you remember, before any babies came you wanted them to look like lee, exactly like lee because flip! he is adorable}

  8. (added 4/21/11) Never use the word prego unless the discussion is about spaghetti sauce.

sorry to you, my friends if you are somehow involved with any of the above pet peeves because ya know, whatever I will probably do them too :( only I hope not, which is the point of this post


Bethany said...

Imagine a picture of me sticking my tongue out at you.

Amy said...

Thank you THANK YOU for this post. We don't need to know when everyone's child eats a piece of food, takes a bath, or simply breathes air. Loved your post. Love all of your posts :).

The Dayleys said...

Um thank you for this post!! Especially about the pup!! They are our first borns and should not get forgotten. :)